i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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