I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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