Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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