i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
Less talking, more tequila
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
