i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
