bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I am one with the molecules
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize