So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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