There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
