White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
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