Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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