i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
