I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
