Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
My breasts were aching with rage.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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