She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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