I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
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