What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
