Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
