i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Randomize
