Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize
