Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
