Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
