I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
