so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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