I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
