oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
