new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
