There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Randomize
