so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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