There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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