Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize
