Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Randomize
