I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Randomize
