dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Randomize
