have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
