i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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