I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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