I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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