Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
