Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
