Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Randomize
