The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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