well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
