My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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