the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize