she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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