Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
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