im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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