Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
