is your mom at the bar?
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize
