I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
